I read an interview with Kenneth Branagh (One time famous English 'luvvie' actor / director) a few years ago and it really stuck in my mind what he said about his work: 'Every morning when I walk to work I feel physically sick.'
Whilst I don't feel quite that bad, every day before teaching I feel pretty nervous about going up there and doing it. It does feel less like a performance now (only been teaching properly for about 6 months) but still I feel a bit wobbly beforehand. I think this is because most of what I do here is lecturing and spoon-feeding, rather than more interactive group work and mutual respect / fun.
9 times out of 10 once I get started I am fine, the bravado takes over and you battle your way through. The worst thing is being in a bad mood and short tempered, once you get pissed off the students just find it funny and down you go! Today I was in that state already, and worsened by a few students pretty much refusing to work. As it takes two to tango there’s not too much to be gained there apart from fruitless hectoring, moaning at them and afterward resolving never to do so again. (Until the next time) Moaning and bad moods never work.
I think my biggest fear is not being listened to and ignored, which says more about my ego than any teaching skills I might have. But like all big fears they are rarely fully realised, and even when they are you see that they aren't that big a deal and you can always get through ok.
So why do it? Well it can be a real buzz and a challenge with kids like these, so it's lovely when things go well and the students are nice, when you have fun and they get it. And when they give me cigarettes after class. Comfort is gained also by the words of a much missed teaching friend of mine; ‘You’ll never have a teaching job this hard again.’ If I do I will jack it all in and become a Paranormal Researcher, which I might just do anyhoo if I knew anything about it. (That’s the other impossible dream, but probably easier than teaching this lot)
Monday, March 29, 2010
I'm a big Christian
I have to pretend to be a Christian here with most people, which is kinda annoying for an agnostic / atheist. I don't really have to do anything except bluff my way though some questioning occasionally (I showed some Muslim students round a church recently - 'Umm, I think that's Saint Peter') but Palestinian friends and strangers will always ask what we consider to be private questions, one of them being what religion you are. Apparently to most Palestinians the concept of Atheism is at best ridiculous and at worst offensive, and since I always have to be careful here with all I say and do it's best to keep quiet.
(Almost every day I am asked if I am married also, and when I say no they are bemused and ask why not. Palestinians are married off aged 20-25 usually. At the age of 31 I am made to feel like an old maid).
It's a very verbal culture here, and because I am a foreigner and a teacher I'm particularly vulnerable to gossip. A few months ago an American Palestinian teacher at this Uni was literally hounded out by an angry mob after prescribing on her syllabus a graphic novel (Perspepolis) that had an image of God in it. I think this was used as somewhat of an excuse because she had become unpopular in some quarters, but it was a stark warning to the rest of us. She wasn’t backed up by the Administration and had to flee quick smart after death threats, proving there’s no justice like angry mob justice!
Religion and students rule the roost here, and us humble teachers merely keep in line and do our best. This can cause one to be somewhat paranoid, and I try to be careful but it can be frustrating sometimes when you can't express yourself properly. On the bright side I get the Christian holidays off, even if I don’t really know what ‘Palm Sunday’ is.
(Almost every day I am asked if I am married also, and when I say no they are bemused and ask why not. Palestinians are married off aged 20-25 usually. At the age of 31 I am made to feel like an old maid).
It's a very verbal culture here, and because I am a foreigner and a teacher I'm particularly vulnerable to gossip. A few months ago an American Palestinian teacher at this Uni was literally hounded out by an angry mob after prescribing on her syllabus a graphic novel (Perspepolis) that had an image of God in it. I think this was used as somewhat of an excuse because she had become unpopular in some quarters, but it was a stark warning to the rest of us. She wasn’t backed up by the Administration and had to flee quick smart after death threats, proving there’s no justice like angry mob justice!
Religion and students rule the roost here, and us humble teachers merely keep in line and do our best. This can cause one to be somewhat paranoid, and I try to be careful but it can be frustrating sometimes when you can't express yourself properly. On the bright side I get the Christian holidays off, even if I don’t really know what ‘Palm Sunday’ is.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Counting my blessings
I hope I haven’t moaned too much and given off too bad an impression of the students here, so here is a random selection of nice moments from the past few days.
- A pretty student of mine from last year told me my beard was ‘too beautiful.’ (‘Beautiful’ is their favourite word, everything is beautiful).
- The students often tell me they have missed me, even if it’s not true. (I don’t mind)
- I stayed behind a bit to help a struggling student and he gave me a cigar. I sometimes get cigarettes as well!
- Had very productive sessions with two intermediate groups teaching transition / cause and effect words.
- One very nice inquisitive student always asks me questions about English I can’t answer, but I like his enthusiasm.
- A pretty student of mine from last year told me my beard was ‘too beautiful.’ (‘Beautiful’ is their favourite word, everything is beautiful).
- The students often tell me they have missed me, even if it’s not true. (I don’t mind)
- I stayed behind a bit to help a struggling student and he gave me a cigar. I sometimes get cigarettes as well!
- Had very productive sessions with two intermediate groups teaching transition / cause and effect words.
- One very nice inquisitive student always asks me questions about English I can’t answer, but I like his enthusiasm.
Hanging with the kids
Two nights back I had the most unbearable experience yet in the Holy Land – I was babbled at long and hard in Arabic and English by some of my student ‘friends’ in their digs in the local village. Ack! The notion of personal space sometimes carries little weight here, especially amongst these frustrated and excitable young chaps.
I had this one guy crouching right up against me, right up in my face asking me to say this and that in Arabic, asking me questions about sex, terms for body parts, with the others, whilst not focused on me, were dancing and fighting and saying ‘suck my dick’ and ‘fuck your mother’ to each other etc. Another kissed me once and tried to get me to dance. I just exaggerated my headache and tiredness and tried to keep my cool.
I was massively tempted to walk out but that would have meant offense and controversy. I’m not sure if these guys are just utter tools, really immature, nervous, trying to impress me, laughing at the foreigner or maybe a mix of all that. All other times I’ve spent with them have been ok but this took the biscuit. They’re all incredibly sexually frustrated as well and can’t do anything about it, so I suppose it’s sublimated into idiotic behavior like this.
I had this one guy crouching right up against me, right up in my face asking me to say this and that in Arabic, asking me questions about sex, terms for body parts, with the others, whilst not focused on me, were dancing and fighting and saying ‘suck my dick’ and ‘fuck your mother’ to each other etc. Another kissed me once and tried to get me to dance. I just exaggerated my headache and tiredness and tried to keep my cool.
I was massively tempted to walk out but that would have meant offense and controversy. I’m not sure if these guys are just utter tools, really immature, nervous, trying to impress me, laughing at the foreigner or maybe a mix of all that. All other times I’ve spent with them have been ok but this took the biscuit. They’re all incredibly sexually frustrated as well and can’t do anything about it, so I suppose it’s sublimated into idiotic behavior like this.
Pride Swallowing Seige
(A prize for spot that phrase) Yes readers, sometimes teaching is most certainly that, particularly in another country. Generally the teaching so far this semester is going really well I think and most students are pretty nice, but some classes just have a bad feel to them, especially those late in the day where the students are lazy and recalcitrant. The honeymoon may be over now that they are starting to get their rubbish homework back…
As well as general giggling, laziness and probably slagging me off in Arabic I almost had a rebellion in a so-called ‘Advanced’ class t’ other day because of my ‘If you phone rings during class you are marked as absent’ rule. Despite giving a warning, a particularly low-ability student’s phone rang and I made a show of reluctantly marking him absent.
Most of the class were up in arms about this decision, telling me it was ‘haram’ which means forbidden / against God / or just really bad and unfair. A few classes back I had let a first offender off, on the condition that they all agreed this would be the one and only time. They apparently didn’t care about this agreement (even the kid whose phone I let off, one of my arch enemies who I had last year also) so I reminded them that it was also ‘haram’ to go back on their word. That shut them up a little. It’s always satisfying to use their own culture / religion against them, ha! The culprit whinged for forgiveness all lesson, most hearts were hardened against me (I did not relent) and the lesson trundled to its’ end.
I got changed into jeans and t shirt and went out again, where a student from last year looked me up and down and burst out laughing to himself, seemingly just because I was dressed in clothes that he had not seen me in before. Now that’s got to be haram.
As well as general giggling, laziness and probably slagging me off in Arabic I almost had a rebellion in a so-called ‘Advanced’ class t’ other day because of my ‘If you phone rings during class you are marked as absent’ rule. Despite giving a warning, a particularly low-ability student’s phone rang and I made a show of reluctantly marking him absent.
Most of the class were up in arms about this decision, telling me it was ‘haram’ which means forbidden / against God / or just really bad and unfair. A few classes back I had let a first offender off, on the condition that they all agreed this would be the one and only time. They apparently didn’t care about this agreement (even the kid whose phone I let off, one of my arch enemies who I had last year also) so I reminded them that it was also ‘haram’ to go back on their word. That shut them up a little. It’s always satisfying to use their own culture / religion against them, ha! The culprit whinged for forgiveness all lesson, most hearts were hardened against me (I did not relent) and the lesson trundled to its’ end.
I got changed into jeans and t shirt and went out again, where a student from last year looked me up and down and burst out laughing to himself, seemingly just because I was dressed in clothes that he had not seen me in before. Now that’s got to be haram.
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Stabbing
I was having a cigarette round the back of the building this morning, always a dumb idea because my students (all around 18 years old) come and talk to me or I am harassed by past students and strangers. 'How are you? ' I love you Simon!' etc. For some reason I am very amusing to them, harrumph.
But anyway one of my most troublesome Beginner students from last year came up to me. Last year he and his mate were the biggest pain in the arse, always talking, laughing, arguing every point with me. I kicked them out of class a few times and argued with them incessentally about it. (Which I now know to be pointless, just say your piece and be done with it)
Annnnywaayy this student told me that he was in trouble and had been in jail for stabbing someone in the chest and leg. I asked him why and he didn't say, he was kinda shifty but you could see he was a little proud of it as well, the swine. He jocularly asked if I wanted to be stabbed and I politely replied 'No thank you' and he went on his way.
If I'd had known he was violently inclined I think I would have been a lot less strict with him last year. Despite all this I still kinda like him, we had some memorable times. I suppose in a way I like all my students, even the intensely irritating ones become like your children. You get to watch them grow, hear about them being in prison and to tut at their violent assaults. Awww.
But anyway one of my most troublesome Beginner students from last year came up to me. Last year he and his mate were the biggest pain in the arse, always talking, laughing, arguing every point with me. I kicked them out of class a few times and argued with them incessentally about it. (Which I now know to be pointless, just say your piece and be done with it)
Annnnywaayy this student told me that he was in trouble and had been in jail for stabbing someone in the chest and leg. I asked him why and he didn't say, he was kinda shifty but you could see he was a little proud of it as well, the swine. He jocularly asked if I wanted to be stabbed and I politely replied 'No thank you' and he went on his way.
If I'd had known he was violently inclined I think I would have been a lot less strict with him last year. Despite all this I still kinda like him, we had some memorable times. I suppose in a way I like all my students, even the intensely irritating ones become like your children. You get to watch them grow, hear about them being in prison and to tut at their violent assaults. Awww.
Friday, March 19, 2010
Palestinians
How do. A word on Palestinians (and I am told the Arab world also) - they are in general the friendliest, most welcoming and helpful people you could ever meet. (sometimes overbearingly so, particularly to us western miserablist types)
A person that you have just met on the street is very likely to invite you into their home and give you more than you can ever eat (you have to keep eating) and much more than they can afford. I was reading how the Zionist troops exploited such hospitality back in the early '40s, when invited into Palestinian homes they would use it to stake out the area for future razing to the ground. (Ilan Pappe - The Ethnic Cleansing of Palestine) But even this would not deter them! I was told recently in the tiny, impoverished village of Fahmi near Jenin that if Israelis visited they would have to treat them well as their guests.
Most plush Palestinian houses have specific 'guest rooms' with cases full of glasses and silverware to indicate their willingness to serve, and indeed I have eaten very well indeed at their generous hands. A whole other blog could be dedicated to the wonder of Palestinian grub.
But now I am a little ashamed to say it's getting a bit much for me. When you visit friends (or people you have just bumped into on the street) you are obliged to stay for hours and hours, and very often overnight, or make up an incredibly urgent and important reason to leave. I was told that a few years ago a visitor had to stay at least three days, even if he had important work to do. Lawks! I'll miss it when its gone though.
A person that you have just met on the street is very likely to invite you into their home and give you more than you can ever eat (you have to keep eating) and much more than they can afford. I was reading how the Zionist troops exploited such hospitality back in the early '40s, when invited into Palestinian homes they would use it to stake out the area for future razing to the ground. (Ilan Pappe - The Ethnic Cleansing of Palestine) But even this would not deter them! I was told recently in the tiny, impoverished village of Fahmi near Jenin that if Israelis visited they would have to treat them well as their guests.
Most plush Palestinian houses have specific 'guest rooms' with cases full of glasses and silverware to indicate their willingness to serve, and indeed I have eaten very well indeed at their generous hands. A whole other blog could be dedicated to the wonder of Palestinian grub.
But now I am a little ashamed to say it's getting a bit much for me. When you visit friends (or people you have just bumped into on the street) you are obliged to stay for hours and hours, and very often overnight, or make up an incredibly urgent and important reason to leave. I was told that a few years ago a visitor had to stay at least three days, even if he had important work to do. Lawks! I'll miss it when its gone though.
Academic Support
Academic Support has re-started! Woop woop! What this means is that student volunteers sit around and wait for other students to come and ask them to do their homework. I am supposed to be Academic Support Co-ordinator, which sounds good and will look good on a CV, but all I have to do is sit in on some sessions, nodding sagely and being the respected foreign teacher guy.
Met a nice volunteer who I felt bad for as he can’t travel anywhere cos he was in prison for 27 days two years ago, and that will follow him around like a reet bugger. I asked what it was for and he said weapons dealing and planning to attack
Also the volunteer girls in Academic Support were practicing conversation, with very heavy topics like ‘Have you ever contemplated suicide?’ and they were all very pious and serious which was a right royal bore. After it finished a girl told me I looked like I had a real sadness behind my eyes. I don’t think I do?! Or maybe we all do, readers.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
The Classes
The classes are a max of 25, (too big!) focus on Reading and Writing, students aged 18-20ish. The most important thing to remember is that they are compulsory classes and most of them, if not all, don't really want to be there.
I didn't know this before coming - I didn't ask, and naively assumed that students at a University would be keen to learn and would choose their own classes. That's why we say the ELC (English Language Center) is more like a school, as I think at a University no one should be 'forced' into classes. Lessons are 50 mins or 1 hour 15, and towards the end - or even 20 mins before the end - the students will often groan 'Enough' or 'halas teacher.' Halas is a word you hear all day every day in Palestine, it means 'finish' or 'enough.'
The classes are (somewhat loosely) grouped into Beginner, Intermediate and Advanced. This semester I have the good fortune of having just Intermediate and Advanced, as the Beginner classes can be very rowdy, immature and of a very low ability, despite having apparently studied English in school almost all of their life. Mixed ability classes are always difficult to deal with as you feel you should be juggling many different sized balls at the same time.
That said, there haven't been any great problems with classes, mainly just talking too much in Arabic. I have given up trying to get them to speak solely in English as it's impossible and the classes are intended to focus on Reading and Writing more than speaking anyway. I very rarely do any group work either as the often somewhat dull Northstar curriculum we use doesn't seem too tailored for that, but I guess I should try it more. (Next semester we are changing to the far superior Headway, but I will be back in England then!)
Overall they're an ok lot for kids / adults who have been pushed into classes. I should experiment more as there's not too much to lose really - A colleague of mine said it best; that teaching in the Middle East is a great opportunity to experiment as you can't fuck things up more than they already are! One of my best lessons was when I got an exceptionally bright student to be the teacher for the lesson, it was great fun and she did a good job teaching Abstract Nouns. She even did an angry walkout at the noise in imitation of mine the lesson before, funny.
I didn't know this before coming - I didn't ask, and naively assumed that students at a University would be keen to learn and would choose their own classes. That's why we say the ELC (English Language Center) is more like a school, as I think at a University no one should be 'forced' into classes. Lessons are 50 mins or 1 hour 15, and towards the end - or even 20 mins before the end - the students will often groan 'Enough' or 'halas teacher.' Halas is a word you hear all day every day in Palestine, it means 'finish' or 'enough.'
The classes are (somewhat loosely) grouped into Beginner, Intermediate and Advanced. This semester I have the good fortune of having just Intermediate and Advanced, as the Beginner classes can be very rowdy, immature and of a very low ability, despite having apparently studied English in school almost all of their life. Mixed ability classes are always difficult to deal with as you feel you should be juggling many different sized balls at the same time.
That said, there haven't been any great problems with classes, mainly just talking too much in Arabic. I have given up trying to get them to speak solely in English as it's impossible and the classes are intended to focus on Reading and Writing more than speaking anyway. I very rarely do any group work either as the often somewhat dull Northstar curriculum we use doesn't seem too tailored for that, but I guess I should try it more. (Next semester we are changing to the far superior Headway, but I will be back in England then!)
Overall they're an ok lot for kids / adults who have been pushed into classes. I should experiment more as there's not too much to lose really - A colleague of mine said it best; that teaching in the Middle East is a great opportunity to experiment as you can't fuck things up more than they already are! One of my best lessons was when I got an exceptionally bright student to be the teacher for the lesson, it was great fun and she did a good job teaching Abstract Nouns. She even did an angry walkout at the noise in imitation of mine the lesson before, funny.
(waiting to start) Teaching English in the Arab American University
Hellos! (This is how the Teaching Assistants and I greet each other, it always makes me laugh but maybe you have to be there)
I start this blog near the beginning of the second semester, a month and a bit in and still haven't worked a full week. This is due to many many strikes, by both students and employees of the good ol' Arab American University.
The reasons for such strikes are always murky to a foriegner like me, (I have never begun to think about trying to learn how to read Arabic, and am learning the spoken lang. very slowly) but the most recent one was due to the troubles in occupied East Jerusalem where the Israelis have re-opened a 17th Century synagogue very near the sight of a holy Muslim site, Haram al-Sharif. Palestinians fear that this is part of a continuing process to push out or destroy them and their holy sites, and along with settlement expansion and general stresses of the occupation there were clashes in Jerusalem and so the student union kicked off.
The funny thing during such so - called student strikes is that the students come and ask you, the teacher, if there is a strike! So I just tell them no now to make things easier for the poor dears. Another silly thing is that we still have to go to work on the strike days but not teach (not too much of a problem for me as I live above the classrooms) and the strike days have to be made up by extending the semester. This makes it not so much a strike as a day off which has to be paid for, kind of defeating the notion of refusing to work to protest your beliefs!
Oh dear. At least I get another day of sitting around with my beloved, aka a portable DVD player which has saved my life on many occasions. Hooray!
I start this blog near the beginning of the second semester, a month and a bit in and still haven't worked a full week. This is due to many many strikes, by both students and employees of the good ol' Arab American University.
The reasons for such strikes are always murky to a foriegner like me, (I have never begun to think about trying to learn how to read Arabic, and am learning the spoken lang. very slowly) but the most recent one was due to the troubles in occupied East Jerusalem where the Israelis have re-opened a 17th Century synagogue very near the sight of a holy Muslim site, Haram al-Sharif. Palestinians fear that this is part of a continuing process to push out or destroy them and their holy sites, and along with settlement expansion and general stresses of the occupation there were clashes in Jerusalem and so the student union kicked off.
The funny thing during such so - called student strikes is that the students come and ask you, the teacher, if there is a strike! So I just tell them no now to make things easier for the poor dears. Another silly thing is that we still have to go to work on the strike days but not teach (not too much of a problem for me as I live above the classrooms) and the strike days have to be made up by extending the semester. This makes it not so much a strike as a day off which has to be paid for, kind of defeating the notion of refusing to work to protest your beliefs!
Oh dear. At least I get another day of sitting around with my beloved, aka a portable DVD player which has saved my life on many occasions. Hooray!
Marhaba!
Hello!
This is my long delayed and kind of contractually obliged blog where I talk about doing what I am doing and being where I am, which is teaching English on a University campus near Jenin in the occupied Palestinian territories. (or just Palestine as we call it here).
I'm 31, male, originally from the South of England. I've been here since late Sept '09, but I spent a month and a half in Palestine in summer '08 also where I taught English to kids and adults in Amari refugee camp near Ramallah.
Here I will talk about Palestine and Palestinians, teaching, and just general stuff and nonsense. Ma salama for now!
This is my long delayed and kind of contractually obliged blog where I talk about doing what I am doing and being where I am, which is teaching English on a University campus near Jenin in the occupied Palestinian territories. (or just Palestine as we call it here).
I'm 31, male, originally from the South of England. I've been here since late Sept '09, but I spent a month and a half in Palestine in summer '08 also where I taught English to kids and adults in Amari refugee camp near Ramallah.
Here I will talk about Palestine and Palestinians, teaching, and just general stuff and nonsense. Ma salama for now!
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